Howard Conder – I FORGIVE YOU!

An open letter to Howard Conder

Dear Howard

It was brought to my attention that you had been making threats and saying you couldn’t forgive those who reported you to the charity commission. This is something between you and God, but I would say that understanding brings an opportunity to forgive.

When I first saw your slanderous lies on Facebook which named me directly, I was angry too, but I forgave you instantly as I knew that you just needed someone to blame and that in your head what you wrote might have made sense to you as you had clearly forgotten who I am. I know this because you had confused me with another woman entirely and considerably rewrote the early days of the channel.

I also forgave you that you refused to even read my emails. I know being faced with the truth that you had smeared an innocent would have made you feel uncomfortable and I understand it’s normal for those who feel guilt to hide from those they have hurt.

What has really got to me about what you said the last few days is in your own words…

“I’m not of the mind to forgive. I know I should, but I’m not.”

“Because the reputation of my family name and your family name (Pettie) has been totally ruined.”

“If you talk to anyone who’s a friend – social friends. Tell them your name and go on the internet and they say… “Oh! You’ve got this… you’re a crook!”

“How can you forgive people for doing that to you?”

Howard that’s exactly what you did to all of us! You went on Facebook and wrote terrible lies about me and others. Lies which left unchallenged would have made us shunned by fellow Christians. The comments by readers on your Facebook page were awful and it made me feel subhuman to read what people thought of me after your false allegations. I may have lost a future ministry due to it and all sorts. You said things that had no basis in truth and to make it worse you posted a confidential report I had sent to the trustees, but had omitted the bits that proved beyond a doubt my point.

Howard, I forgive you for all of it. I truly do! The problem is that you refuse to admit you were wrong to post what you did on Facebook and tell lies on air etc. You still maintain that I did all those horrible things and you still bizarrely blame me for the investigation.

I repeat that I did not go to the Charity Commission and had no intention of doing so. I did go to them at the time I started blogging due to exasperation and the level of the lies involved as the trustees failed me. Had you apologised and put things right we would probably not be in this situation.

If I have indicated that I wish to be sued then it is for the sole purpose of being in a room with you and having a judge tell you how wrong you are. As you refuse to talk to me, this seems the only way of a dialogue. Trust me Howard, I don’t have the time for a pointless court battle, but I know for a fact that if I had published even one untruth we would have been in court long ago. You would have made sure of that!

I do love you Howard. It costs me nothing to say that. Yes, you’ve hurt me and my family immeasurably, but in the year I spent at RTV I got to know you and care for you more than you realise.

Proverbs 27 says – 5. Better is open rebuke Than love that is concealed. 6. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.

You have had wounds from me, but they were the wounds from a friend trying to help you. Sadly you have surrounded yourself with the wrong people who do not challenge things and let you hurt yourself. Pettie is the architect of the the system that we (and probably the Charity Commission) take issue with. You cannot claim to take no money from RTV, but then take approx £1,000,000 a year from selling airtime via 21st Century TV Ltd. This is the issue. Your pie charts and fundraising tactics are deceptive.

I don’t wish to destroy you. I wish for you to repent and put things right with those you have wronged. You don’t see it, but I was being your friend when I sent that report to Peter Darg. Had things been dealt with at that point the investigation may not have taken place as my report was long before the investigation and warned of this exact scenario.

I wish you had listened.

Sarah

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39 thoughts on “Howard Conder – I FORGIVE YOU!

  1. It seems that Christian TV channels only have a limited time to run before Satan takes them out .I have watched them rise up then fall.Terribly sad….

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    • You’re right Len. The problem in my opinion is that those attracted to TV are the ones who are least suited to it. People see it as prestigious, but in reality it’s just a grind and no one person is above another. As you say… they rise and then fall, probably with pride.

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  2. I didn’t report them to the Charities Commission either, but that has not stopped his apparent onslaught against me. Although I have not heard any of it first hand as I don’t watch his TV programme. Anyway, I don’t hold grudges. Maybe he can do the same. As the Lord’s Prayer says “forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors” (at least in Scotland it does). Forgiveness is a two way street.

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    • It’s crazy isn’t it. Who are these 10 people? I guess I am one, but only after the investigation had started due to the failure of trustees to rectify the situation.

      Your blog was so balanced and fair. Howard should have seen it for what it was rather than vilifying you.

      As usual Gordon, you are gracious and fair with your words.

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  3. Gordon..did you remove some of your blogs because Howard was angry towards you? this is a genuine question. If I googled RTV yours was always the first one that came up, but no more.

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    • I removed it for three reasons:

      1. I did not have enough time to keep it up to date.
      2. The threats, basically. More complicatedly I just wanted it to go away as it was having a bad effect on my health.
      3. Work related, even though it predates my current job.

      In relation to #2 it appears to have made no difference! I think that indicates that there is no conciliatory action coming from the RTV side.

      The root of the issue is that the Revelation Foundation is a registered charity and as such it is open to public scrutiny. Unfortunately, a lot of Christian ministries use registered charities as a mechanism for getting more money through Gift Aid while still wanting to be private, or family, businesses.

      It would have been better to keep the two more clearly separate and that is likely to be the outcome of the Charity Commission Investigation.

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  4. Hi Sarah!

    Your open letter commendably puts you firmly in the right, and Mr. Conder firmly in the wrong; you are operating in the right Christian spirit, while he most definitely is not – Ephesians 4:32. And when it comes to issues of forgiveness, does he not have a very real and urgent need to repent and seek personal forgiveness, not from any man or woman, but from the Lord Himself for so deeply and determinedly compromising the Gospel by airing false teachers – and all for the sake of filthy lucre? Such tragic perversion!

    My prayers go with you, Sarah. Keep strong and trusting in the Lord, in this matter as in all things!

    Best wishes in Him,
    Rob.

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    • Hi Anonymous.

      Yes, I do have quite a few thoughts. Unfortunately, the programme featured so many lies that I feel I might need to write a public response.

      There were claims that my blog and others have no evidence, but everything I’ve written is backed up and evidence is all over my blog. Howard has a very long history of court battles and I know if anything I wrote was not fact, I would have been sued long ago.

      Yemi lied about the photo copied cheques. He’s talked to me extensively about them and was even willing to give them as evidence.

      I have contacted Yemi to say that I don’t understand how he can say what he’s said, especially accusing me of blackmail as I had been actively censoring my blog and others on the subject whilst trying to deal with the situation a better way.

      I considered Yemi a friend, but sadly, he has been caught telling untruths about me and others. He also implied that Chris contacted him and gave him information, but Chris was contacted by Yemi and Chris did not know what was happening with 21st Century TV Ltd until Yemi told him.

      What I would like is for Howard or anyone to point out specifically what I’ve said that they consider a lie, but unfortunately they make blanket statements which have no substance.

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  5. It seems misrepresenting the truth is the default position of Rev TV. As I said in an earlier post, Yemi needs to get out of that nest of vipers. Leslie Conder said on R Mornings the other day that the channel welcomes all views, dissenting or otherwise. That, as we all know, is a blatant lie. Watching Leslie Conder is interesting, she is biblically ignorant, not particularly intelligent and is clearly a poor advert for Corbyn Wheeler’s eat well, live well nonsense.

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  6. Hi Sarah!

    Just watched the show, which was an absolutely sad and absolutely sickening experience! One thing you can have no doubt about now is that Yemi is definitely no friend of yours! Or indeed of any of us bloggers who have raised legitimate questions about the Conders and the Revelation TV operation. How excruciating to hear Yemi echoing the Conder spin that people voicing their concerns are being used by the Enemy. But yes, Yemi, there certainly is a great spiritual battle underway here. It’s one to alert people to who are really the co-conspirators in unrighteousness: the ones who perch in the lofty ivory towers of RTV!

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    • Hi Rob.

      It made me feel a bit sick as well.

      What I don’t understand is how Yemi thinks he will get away with what he has said. Chris and I have a lot of proof about what he knows and yet he’s reduced our evidence to “gossip” and “innuendo”.

      It’s almost like Yemi is under a spell. You can see him trying not to fall in completely, but that was not my friend Yemi on that show.

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  7. I have just watched the late show for the first time and I’m amazed at how uncomfortable and embarrassed Yemi is throughout. Under a spell is an apt description, he is clearly intimidated by Conder who is, of course, an archetypal control freak. It’s very sad really.

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    • It’s sad to see that Yemi is clearly being dominated by Howard. I do feel sorry for Yemi. Things moved so fast that there was little opportunity for him to think before he said the things he did.

      One thing I’ve always tried to live by is questioning if you would say the thing you are saying to the person you are talking about.

      If you wouldnt have the conviction to say it to the person, you shouldnt say it at all. Everything I’ve written has been backed up and I want to talk to Howard about it face yo face. On the contrary, Howard and Yemi refuse to talk to me about things. Lies always catch up with people in the end.

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  8. You are right Sarah, it’s not only the fact that they peddle lies, it’s that they do it in such a sustained and plausible way, making themselves out to be victims, and, of course, claiming always that they are true Christians.

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    • The most shocking part is that viewers are so convinced that they are genuine victims that they have given more since the charity commission investigation.

      What us sick is that even if the CC found them guilty of all sorts, a lot of viewers would still believe that they are victims and the CC is anti christian. I don’t know what it takes to get through to some people.

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  9. Well, Here we are at the end of 2016 and no further forward, or backwards. I guess we now live in a “post-truth” society where rather than trying to determine facts, people build a narrative and get people to buy into it, therefore determining their own truth. The problem any religious organisation has is that the more people oppose them the greater proof they have that they are being persecuted, and are therefore correct. Anyway, happy Christmas!

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    • As usual Gordon, you’ve said it exactly as it is. The “post truth” society really doesn’t care. Where is the discernment that is so badly needed these days?

      Hopefully 2017 will bring change to the situation. Happy Christmas.

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      • Happy Christmas to you too Sarah.

        Regarding the Yemi issue. There might come a point where all the documentation has to be put in the public domain so that people can decide for themselves. Not that people necessarily would. There seems to be a real lack of discernment, not just amongst Christians, but the population in general. It seems that if a lie is told 100 times people will accept it as the truth.

        From what I am hearing this should all come to a head by the beginning of February, so we will see what happens. I am still of the opinion that no rules were actually broken. The rules at that time, and even now, are quite lax and I am sure the “complex business structure” will feature in the Charity Commission report findings along with “some lack of transparency”. Anyway, we will see what they eventually say.

        One thing though: I wouldn;t like to be running a business in Spain with all those bills in Euros while all my income was in GB pounds. That can’t be comfortable at the moment.

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      • I think you’re right re Yemi. I will write a proper post at some point soon and believe Treena is already drafting something.

        I’m unsure what the charity commission will conclude. What they have been doing is fraudulent, but a bit of a legal gray area.

        My objection has always been the deliberate misleading of viewers. It’s not ethical or Godly to inspire people to give the “widows mite” based on untruths.

        Regardless of the CC conclusion, the situation must be dealt with one way or another.

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  10. Sarah, I think the personal situation between the parties does have to be dealt with or it will fester away. I don’t feel any personal animosity, probably because I have not watched any of these programmes, but I do feel bad about being attacked for things I have not done (e.g. making the complaint to the charity commission or write that email – which clearly comes from someone else, the head of it makes that clear or online “trolling”). I have never had any communication with Mr Conder or anyone working for Revelation TV, either by social media, phone, letter or email. Not once. So I am not sure how they can sustain these claims. I am also not obsessed with the issue. Anyone who has read my blog knows that it is quite wide ranging, but tends to be about music. I feel like I am living in a parallel universe. There must be another one where I have actually done these things and it’s just leaking through to this one.

    Presumably, we are going to get the Charity Commission report shortly. I still don’t think they broke any rules. There was just too much confusion between the business and the charity. It might be that some donors felt misled over the issue of ministries paying for air time and whether that was needed to pay for the running costs. That is really a fundraising standards issue and it is quite complicated because as long as the money was used for what donors gave it for then how they used their other trading income (selling airtime) is not really a problem.

    I suspect the bigger issue for the Charity Commission is the conduct of the charity during the investigation. It often is if you look through old reports. If the charity has complied with all the requests from the investigation and been nice to the investigators then they will tend to get a better write up in the final report. If they haven’t then they tend to be presented in a less favourable light.

    However, not many people will ever see the report. It only remains on the commission website for a short time and most will only hear about its findings second hand. I am sure Revelation TV will do a good job of presenting the findings in a clear and fair manner to their viewers and all will be well.

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    • I share your feelings of being in a parallel universe. I haven’t even thought a lot of the things I’ve been accused of doing. As you say, there is no evidence to prove Howards claims, but if you repeat a lie often enough, you will even believe it yourself.

      Regarding the Charity Commission, I cannot believe it’s taking so long. I suppose the RTV finances are such a web of interconnected companies that it makes it hard to decipher what is going on. I do agree that legally it is a grey area. They have deliberately mislead people with their fundraising and it’s really clear that it has been deliberate. Things like the old about us section of the RTV website cannot be considered just a misunderstanding.

      “Howard and Lesley began the TV station by forming a private company and remortgaging their home to put their own money into it. They could easily have retained ownership of the Revelation TV station for themselves and reaped the benefit of it financially in the years to come. But instead they handed it all over to the registered charity Revelation Foundation and wrote off their initial investment. Money was not their reason for starting the channel and never has been…

      …The TV station and all that happens at Revelation TV is in the hands of the registered UK charity, Revelation Foundation. Howard and Lesley are not even trustees of the charity and receive no benefit from it. “

      There is nothing even arguably true about the above.As you rightly say Gordon, there is nothing legally wrong with a charity having a profit making arm, but the deliberate deception should at least be brought to light. I would say that it does constitute fraud, but lets be honest, the authorities have far bigger fish to fry. I’m still quietly optimistic for our vindication whether by the Charity Commission or otherwise.

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  11. I’m starting to think we are never going to see a final report from the CC, I suspect also that some sort of deal may have been done behind the scenes to give both sides an easy way out. It’s inconceivable that a report should take this long to be produced and Rev TV continues to hoodwink it’s viewers with untruths and platitudes. All very disturbing, all quite disgusting.

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    • I agree William. It’s crazy that it’s taking so long. I suspect there is such a complicated situation that the report is likely causing issues. The fact that rtv were also encouraging their loyal supporters to write to the charity commission and put pressure on them must be making it even more difficult.

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      • One thing to bear in mind is that the Charity Commission sometimes don’t publish enquiry reports. These are ones where they feel the public interest would not be served and they usually cite a potential to bring the voluntary sector into disrepute. Generally this is enquiries into very large, well known charities though.

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      • Here is a case of similar length for you that was published today:

        https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/604501/the_spiritualist_association_of_great_britain.pdf

        Outcome was that too long had elapsed before and during the enquiry for any regulatory action to be taken.

        I think the claim was that one of the BVI property companies may have been connected to the trustees. There was no evidence of this found. It has taken four years to reach a conclusion and been challenged by the charity several times.

        This may well be what happens to the Revelation Foundation case.

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